I was so fortunate last night to have great conversation with a group male college students. Our male college division, Young’s Men Evolving Now, had its weekly Forum at Kutztown University. The topic for the night was, “The New Guy”. At times in our lives we will have the honor of being the new man in our partner’s lives and at times we may have to deal with someone else being the new guy in our exes’ life. Both of these times will test our character; how we manage our feelings, respect the feelings and position of others, and respect ourselves in the process.
The guys made powerful statements regarding beginning and ending relationships. Their ultimate goal was to introduce and set a new standard of manhood for their partners. The members recognized there are other good men out there, but wanted to leave a legacy in the lives and minds of their partners that couldn’t be lessened or devalued for a lifetime. This made me think… what happens to us and our relationships during the middle. We start strong and hopefully end strong, but the middle is where life is and the crux of the real relationship. If we can hold strong to our original goal of wanting to be the best man our partner will ever know or need to know (and her the same), how great could our relationship be? While in the middle, life gets real and transitions occur: house, moves, jobs, kids, aging parents, and more! We encounter our partners on levels we’ve never prepared for or thought of. The traditional remedy is communication and commitment; but I want to add a quote from Vince Lombardi, “Practice doesn’t make perfect. Perfect practice makes perfect”. If you were playing sports, hopefully we would practice, practice, and practice to be our best on game day. But is not just practice. We can practice all the wrong habits… it’s perfect practice! In our relationship… Game Day is every day! So many times, we make efforts in our way instead of the way that may be best needed or most appreciated by our partner. What will you begin to practice today within your relationship to set a new standard, EVOLVING you, your partner, and your family?